Cont. - Dedicated To : Muhammad Fayyadh Al Usaym (Part 2)

And yes, yesterday was a looong post from me without any eye-feasting pictures to serve. Pity me, not having any evidence to show...

I was in the operation room, lying there on the operation table. My hands were wide opened, strapped (I think?). In front of me, there was a turquoise cloth hanged at my chest level. To prevent me from watching them cut open my belly. Blergh....

Before, Faidrol said goodbye before, and I went cold feet.

I was scared, yes scared as this was my first time being under the knife. My sister had experience this herself, when she was young; operation to remove her sinus since she always had running nose...

Before my hands were strapped left and right, they asked me to sit and hug a pillow. In that seating position, hugging tightly (or holding on very very tightly, scared), the anesthesiologist  injected something at my spinal cord. It felt like an ant biting, as they have planted the idea in our brain. Or so I felt that way.

Waiting for the anesthesia to kick off, they prepared the above; the curtains, the straps and had my operation gown taken off...

This is it. I'm having my baby without any wailing, crying, pushing nor even a drop of sweat...

Subhanallah... For the knowledge He created...

When it started, I almost felt nothing; just a feel that someone is pressing our tummy though. Pushing and shoving. And there was one time I think one of the doctors strapped something with a yarn and threw the spindle across the room, over at my head. What was that flying around ? The thought that something was tied in my belly and the source was far enough to reach... That wasn't easy. Ha-ha.

And during the operation, the doctors mostly kept quiet and focused on their work. When finally the baby was out, one of the nurses (or the helpers, I'm not sure myself) said "Ah besar ni hidup la...". Wow. That was an understatement of the year. I almost vomited hearing that, just because it's my child she was talking about. The baby had to live! Or I die having him to live.

Then the baby was brought to a small room, located in the same operation room. I can see the nurse was cleaning him, but I didn't hear a thing. I tried consoling myself that the baby is too tiny to make up a crying sound just like normal babies out there.

When he was finally clean, the nurse showed me and asked me something I couldn't remember now. I was like "Oh comelnya..." haha. And she told me to say the baby's gender. Oh that was the procedure ? Oh ok... "Baby boy...". Not tired. Not sweating. Just relieved. That the baby survived, so was I.

Now that I was not sure where the baby was brought too, the doctors finished up their work by stitching my belly back to it's normal state. They worked very quietly, and very quickly. It was almost Maghrib (around 7.15PM; the baby was out at 7.05PM) that they wrapped up the operation...

I was wheeled out from the operation room and back to the observation room, near the procedure room in which those pregnant mothers waiting for the babies to come out. But my room is a bit more special, with more plugs over my head, with more monitors and sinks and counters. Because it is meant for observation rather than procedure ?

I was there overnight, not having even a chance to see my newborn baby. By this time Faidrol was already with me again, updating me on the baby health status.

Before the operation begun, the doctor, Dr Azmi already informed us on the risks of having a premature baby. If by the time the baby is out, with a premature lung, the baby needs to be connected to a ventilator instead of the normal incubator. By this time, Putrajaya Hosp only have few units, all used up by other babies. Yes, if my baby came out with a premature lung, he may not have the chance to be put into a ventilator. And Dr Azmi also informed us all other hospitals (Gov. Hosps i.e. Serdang or Klang) also do not have any available unit. The unit is immobile though, as it needs to be connected to the wall... So moving it from a hospital to another is impossible, unless we bring our baby to the hospital which has any of those.

And yes, it costs RM6,000 / day if we opt for our baby to be under the care of a private hospital with the ventilator... Also source from Dr Azmi.

This was where both Faidrol and I prayed very, very hard for the survival of our only son. Hoping the best will come in either a normal way or miraculous way. Hoping that Allah will help us both, either financially, or naturally.

News from the NICU (all premature babies are stationed here, for how long ? Depends on your baby's health status) that my baby survived with a mature lung! Alhamdulillah praise be to Allah. He even did not need to depend on a ventilator, he can breath on his own... Alhamdulillah... He just needed to be in an incubator, just because it provides a warmer surroundings and to regulate the temperature around them.

Another incredibly long post from me... That the baby is now out, and I am in the observation room. What happened to me? Or the baby? Let's read in the next post...

Till then,

Love,

Emma.

Dedicated To : Muhammad Fayyadh Al Usaym (Part 1)

It was well over two years ago, two years and 11 months to be exact, that I gave birth two my second child, my first son. I am moved to post this thing today, as this will be the official post of the first dedicated to my son, as I have never posted anything only about him.

I am writing what I could remember of the moments before, during and post of giving birth to him...

It was August 2nd, 2011; week 32 that I went for the rutine monthly checkup at Putrajaya Hospital. This is the second time that I considered FPP Programme provided by the Government since it is very affordable and we will be taken care of by the Specialists instead of normal MO. We can choose our specialists (if we know any) and opt for First Class wards instead of the normal Open Concept wards (don't ask why is my hosptial jargons are rarely used by the people who work in the hospital, 'cause I know nothing about hospitals, I just write down what I want to say! :P)

I waited patiently, as always, alone, without husband nor the maid. Or my occassional partner, my sister Fayzah. It was afternoon, opted for the specific time since in the mornings there were always full of people queueing up for checkups (FPP at the point of time was very popular because it's the in thing?).

Unfortunately, my specialist Dr Wan Hazim; was that time performing Umrah. I was unlucky for the second time, as during my first labor under the same specialist, he was breaking fast with his family. I was not worried as an FPP patient, the other specialist (here, Dr Azmi) will take care of me.

Things were normal, urine checkup, blood pressure checkup, weight taken at things like that. But in no time that the nurses alerted me of my blood pressure readings were not good, hence they advised me to rest for a little more time (there at their waiting benches). They even worried to see my urine result, where it has more protein than my body should have (doctors who read this please amend if this is wrong?).

I was not worried at this stage, but once I got into Dr. Azmi's room for more detailed checkup, I was advised by him to be admitted on the day itself! Now this scares me...

He told me my readings are not good, it was a silent killer to both the mother and the unborn child. I may not feel anything except for headaches (which is very normal to me). Apart from headaches, everything went under the carpet, unnoticed. That was why Pregnancy Induced Hypertension (PIH) mothers are advised to be admitted or given house rest warrant.

Dr Azmi further advised me to downgrade myself from being an FPP patient to normal patient since this is totally due to my hypertension, not for labour. There is no need to be an FPP patient just because you have hypertension and paying more than you should to the hospital.

And so I called my dad, to pack my things up (and also to give deposits! I did not have any cash with me at the time). My dad arrived in no time and I was wheeled (wheeled!) to the ward room. I was starting to be uncomfortable at the situations I was having at the time, since there was no one with me and I needed to go through that all by myself.

When my dad finally went back home, I was resting in a two-bedded room and the nurses came and went to my room every hour, to check on my blood pressure. As I mentioned earlier, PIH is something we say a silent killer. Read more here. The article does not mention the danger as what I've written here, but you know, paranoids. Hehe.

One nurse came and checked on my blood pressure. She has worried sick look stapled on her face looking at my result. I did not recall the reading, but she told me to lie down more and rest more. "Dr kat sini tangan cepat.... Sapa2 yang ada problem dorang ceaser je..." she told me that. That is a new experience to me.

Ha-ha. My first child, my daughter Faryyal, was born normal, I mean natural childbirth (medicated with pethidine and sedated with nitrous oxide; as "natural" as I can be avoiding the common epidural).

The next morning, August 3rd, 2011, a nurse diligently came in to check for my blood pressure, as a routine. And yes, they needed the result to decide whether or not I am staying for a ceaser. To save my unborn child as well as to reduce my hypertension. As what Dr Hazim told me before, "satu je ubat untuk PIH ni, beranak lah..." dengan rileknya nya berkata kedak ya kan... Haha.

And guess what was my result then? Yes, still very high and very dangerous for the baby to stay in my womb. Dr Azmi came in, and told me that today I'll be wheeled in to the operation room (haha, another experience! Previously it was only waiting / procedure room) and perform ceaser on me. The only thing I was afraid of this kind of child birth was during post-natal. The "care" that the wound need, was extremely hard to adhere to. Let see if this is true.

I forgot to mention earlier that, since I downgraded myself from FPP to become normal (public) patient, I should be served by an MO. But since my monthly checkup was with a specialist, and Dr Azmi took over Dr Hazim since he left for umrah, he agreed to take me in under his care (I am not sure till now what was his reason of wanted to take me in). This is really a blessing in disguise, you know, being a normal patient but served by a specialist! I heard he is just as good or more than Dr Hazim...

By this time, Faidrol had arrived from Penang earlier that morning. On the day itself, he was with me up till the time I was wheeled out into the operation room, barely wearing anything (malu oi...) but the hospital gown, the type that tied at the back, showing our butts off... My Ipod was in the ward, thinking it would be safe there. I brought with me my handphone, in case anyone wanted to call me before the operation.

Before the op, I was stationed first at the procedure room where, I was flanked by the trainees! I have never seen so many trainees at one time; three were shaving my pubic hair (really?? Do you really need three for that???), two were searching for my vines at the right side, another two at the left side (they injected corticosteroids on me, in effect; I can feel my body slowly turned warm inside) to make my baby's lungs mature. It was lucky that I'll be having him (yes my son) delivered at 33 weeks of pregnancy, so the dose should be not much and possibility of my baby surviving the birth will be higher.

The procedure is supposed to wait for the next 24 hours before the baby is delivered, but it could be due to my 33 weeks of pregnancy that they gave it a go for the operation; not waiting for the drug to take effect (they are positive that my baby's lungs are mature at this time).

I went into the operation around 5.30PM. I was scared for being a first time for ceaser, for my child's life, for my own life and for my daughter's life if Allah wanted to take my life during the operation. I asked for forgiveness from my husband, and from my parents too, and from my siblings. We never know what will happen during the operation... 

My parents and Aunty Ana and Uncle Din were also outside the operation room but I didn't get to see them since only husband are allowed to visit the patient at the procedure / operation room.

 I'll continue to the next post since this is incredibly and unexpectedly long post for me. Never knew something that I thought I forget the details but I didn't... I'll try to gather some pictures of the pre or post natal of my son if I have any.

Till then, later...

Final Week before Ramadhan 1434 Hijrah

I am in dire need of completing most of the tasks pending for my new house. I am in the final week before weeks of cleansing and repenting... Take a look into my entry on this here.

In the meanwhile, I am still here at my office, writing something off from my laptop, with my lunch wide open from the container.

I'm having fried chicken and some vegetables. As usual...

And Faidrol sent images of a kitten (it's skin looks like an American shorthair, only it is in Penang hehehe) asked me if it is worth bringing it home, introduce to our kids.

Is it trying to play with slippers ? Is it cute ?
Haha. After six years, so here it is.

I said yes, give it to our kids to play and to develop their sense of empathy towards animals. Pretty good ha. Let see what happen when the kitten arrive at our doorstep this late afternoon...